bon voyage

The next few months are going to be filled with a lot of change, most of which is much desired. In the next couple of weeks, I'm going to China to teach English for an undisclosed amount of time, which probably means I won't be able to update this blog. Once I figure out a blog site that is not blocked by the great firewall, I'll post a link on myspace for anyone who is interested.

While I'm there I intend to complete ANOMIE, as well as possibly work with musicians in the area, which I am most thrilled about. I made the decision to go there so I can grow as an artist, musician, teacher, and person. It's what I need to do to push my life forward and assume a career, as I've been rather stagnant these past four years (other than traveling). I'm excited to meet new people, travel overseas, learn a new language, adapt to a different culture, and learn about another world in order to understand my own. Please wish me luck and keep me in your thoughts. And KEEP LISTENING TO MY SHIT YO. ;-)

much love.
misu

Two Steps

i'm two steps ahead of you
yet i am two steps behind
you are lagging in the heart
while i play catch-up with the mind

i'm craving expansion
while you're craving retreat
find a place to rest your head
while i move my feet

i want to roam the globe
rotate it like a satellite
circle around you like the sun
that brings you morning light

i'll leave you here to make mistakes
i made some years ago
of loving ever foolishly
until you must let go

i hope those steps don't drag you down
and make you build a wall
higher than the pedestal
under which you crawl

if i find myself standing
inside your echo faint
i hope it sounds like laughter
or another pleasant state

and if i find myself caught up
and eager to stand still
i hope you're standing next to me
but by your own free will

please don't forget my softness
and don't forget my face
if your heart gets ripped right out
i'll fill its empty space

only if you promise that
you'd do the same for me
if our steps become aligned
and we walk evenly

Fortune Cookie

i would like to present my songs to you
like tiny slips of paper inside fortune cookies
lacking the generic reason most seem to occupy.
i want mine to resemble something real, at least fill you with the idea
that someone out there loves you, regardless of what you do,
where you're going, or who you're with.

i want them to leave a sweet aftertaste in your mouth
that stays with you as you grow older.
every wrinkle on your skin i could crawl inside
because i treasure the depth in you.
i've seen you naked and i've seen your flaws
and i admired them quietly, whether it was two feet away
or seven states away, my sweet memory
enveloped like a tiny slip of paper
inside a fortune cookie.

i can't be with you but i keep coming back in song
leaving them for you like tiny slips of paper
hoping maybe you'll stumble across one
and be filled with the idea that someone out there loves you

In a Room Full of Pianos

you and i ran into each other in mexico by accident.

it had been years since i'd seen you,
the remains of your hair were gray
while mine were concealed with clairol.
it was outside the elevator you saw me
you kissed the cheek of my tanned skin and
i smiled at the fact it took less than a moment for you to recognize me.

we stepped into the elevator together,
i whispered in your ear, shyly, that i thought you looked nice
still distinctive. your grey, ironic sweatsuit made you look younger
than the other men standing beside us dressed in coat and ties.
our pleasure coaxed their business, inquiring minds wanted to know
who is that woman standing with you, sir,
and you quipped that i was your sister.

we stepped off, onto shiny white linoleum floor
our heels hitting it with a staccatoed rhythm
while the scent of espresso came from a cappuccino maker.
it explored our noses, it worked like a magnet between us and
i smiled as i buried my face in your upper arm,
hearing the lush whispers of resort couples sitting on couches
basking in the sunshine and the lull of the ocean outside
beckoning from the wall-sized window,
in this room full of baby grand pianos.

"pick one," i whispered. "play for me.
they won't mind as long as you're good."
and you knew you were good, you were always good.
i loved the way you took a seat like it was the first time
with one the color of cream, i knew what you were thinking.
Your face faked alienation,
pretending to be Larry David at a piano lesson,
knowing the people nearby would stop mid-sentence,
and flash us dirty looks all too credulously.
you placed your fingers on the keys,
then secretly glanced up at me
winking at the beginning of a haunting melody
that made my bones ache

i remember resting my arms on the velvet sofa
facing you while you played the song so delicately.
(and pardon the cliche but you could've heard a pin drop on the linoleum floor.)
i remember thinking,
All my life I've always wanted to be touched by a pianist
but wondering why you never occurred to me when I had those desires.
Maybe it's because you were always too busy embracing other things
whether it was steering wheels, other women
pulling you in the opposite direction
our lives like secrets never told to one another
like my graying hair or the fact you wore sweatsuits to Mexico,
intricacies we'd never waste our time describing because we never had the time.
And this time, you did not rush the song, i coiled around each key
like holding chocolate on my tongue and letting it melt on its own,
you, playing that arrangement, for me
as though you had all the time in the world
then i wondered if this encounter in Mexico really was by accident.














i love dreams like these, such a sweet escape.

Brick Walls

Greetings, friends and fellow readers.

Sorry for the lack of updates. Truth is I've been taking a much-needed break. It was beginning to become a quantity over quality issue so I'm trying to step back and revamp the songs I have.

I did some guest vocals for a friend, Scotty Lingelbach, with "Feather Merchant." We might be doing some more collaboration this summer. I'm looking forward to it.

I'm also excited to be changing scenery on a grander scale come August. I've got a big project I plan on getting into, more to come when that becomes more concrete.

Thanks for reading, xo to all

taramisu!

sup

Private Editors. is now available on iTunes. Hooray. That New Year's Resolution I made over a year ago was fully accomplished.

I've been steadily working on ANOMIE. Sorry to sound repetitive. I uploaded another song to my myspace, "Buttercup." Kinda goes against the constitution of the album, but nonetheless I found it pertinent, because I am human, I relapse like the best of them.

I am hoping to do more travel in a few months, on a more extreme measure than just a south/west coast venture. I really want it to affect me as an artist, positively, I want to grow. I want to record sounds from foreign places and use them in songs. I think this could be useful.

So far, I have 12 tracks for ANOMIE... I'm debating whether or not I want to remove Buttercup and add a different track. Depends on how fast I get sick of it.

xo
misu

siamese dream

I'm in a foul mood, easily distracted. I lost my debit card somehow last night and can't find it. That sucks. I cancelled it fortunately, but now I'm shit out of luck for the next 10-14 business days.

Anyway, I completed "Trainwreck" a few days ago and have it available to hear on myspace. I purchased the domain name www.mytaramisu.com the other day and will be making my own website.

I have a raging headache. It's circulating around my skull as though someone has attached a tremolo pedal to my cerebrum and they keep stomping on that shit, over and over round and round. i want my card back. sonofabitch.

The other morning it snowed. I woke up just in time to watch it. It resembled dandruff. Winter's last layer of skin, shedding in the air. Mother nature's bright idea. I had an extremely intense dream and woke up at 7:30 am. This was right after I was somewhere else, walking down a street in New Orleans after visiting with someone of my past, in secret. His mother had told him to wake up, that it was 9:30. But it was really 7:30 and I realized it as I was juxtaposed to that n'awlins street. So bizarre. I said out loud, "She lied to him" and then I woke up and it really was 7:30. It was kind of an awful dream altogether, involving copious amounts of sex and bad memories. And it was so damn vivid that I almost felt sick. I would've much rather dreamt about someone I'd currently want to sleep with, not this person. So while I watched mother nature's dandruff floating around, I thought about him and wondered if he had shared the dream because it was too intense for just myself. A "Siamese Dream" if you will. Good call on an album name, Smashing Pumpkins. Good call.